Hercules #1; Cover and art by Mark Texeira, written by Frank Tieri, inks by Jimmy Palmiotti
Thor, God of Thunder, is currently lying dead in the Marvel Comics stables. What better opportunity for them then to use the
son of Zeus and Alcmene, Hercules, Prince of Power to soak up some of that
divine spotlight love?
For those familiar only with the Hercules in the leather pants of Kevin Sorbo, some of the legendary twelve labours:
Taking on the Nemean lion and killing it with his bare hands,
Hercules fashions himself a nice fur coat from the carcass of the slain monster feline.
Helps out the Hydra of the Lernean swamps, suffering from a seriously bad hair day. With assistance from his nephew, Iolaus, they end up searing eight of her heads before lopping off the immortal ninth. Customer satisfaction is moot with no customer to speak out.
Breaking two rivers through King Augeas' stables -- cleaning staff having not visited for three decades --
Hercules flushes out the manure and stench within a single day and without getting dirty.
In the land of the Amazons, Hercules spots a rather fine girdle. Boxing day shopper madness overcomes him as he kills Hippolyte. Only later realising that she willfully gave up the accessory.
Complaints from residents see Hercules heading down to Hades. There he puts down the Cerebus, a monstrous dog with three heads and long
reigning champion of backyard brawls.
(abridged, dubiously recounted and not entirely accurate)
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